YOUR OPINION MATTERS!

I am often amazed at how little people think of themselves. I recently had a woman who was injured several years ago by a fall and who relies on her family for care say, “I am such a burden and I have little to offer to anyone around me”. She and many others often believe they have little to offer to others and their opinion does not count.

Let me make it very clear, your opinion always counts! I say this because of the way each of us is put together. We all come from hundreds of millions of different gene combinations from our parents and grandparents and genetically none of us is alike. All of us are raised in a different environment even if you come from the same family as your siblings and are all raised in the same town and home. No one ever has the same experiences as their siblings or friends.  We may all go to the same place or be in the same accident or have the same physical experience but because of our genetics and experience to that point in our lives we see it in a different manner and it impacts us in a different way.  Thus our sense of the experience is different. Because of all of the factors affecting our lives on a daily basis we are all singularly different.

As a result I would be a fool not to listen to someone’s opinion no matter their age or situation because theirs is a unique perspective. 

Richard Y Moody, PhD

Clinical Psychologist

TurningLeaf Wellness Center

ATTITUDE IS CONTAGIOUS

Have you ever come home to a frustrated spouse? What about arriving to work only to be greeted by an angry boss? How are you affected by the negative energy they are giving off? Most addicts in recovery would agree using drugs and/or alcohol can make dealing with the negative energy of others manageable. This poses a problem for the recovering addict: How do I deal with other’s negative attitudes without using?

Attitude is like a virus, untouchable even by the strongest antibiotic. Antibiotics have the power to slow, and even kill, the growth of the deadliest bacteria, nevertheless are powerless when confronted with the smallest virus. This leaves many of us overcome by another’s attitude, which infects us like a virus. Our smiles turn to frowns and laughter to anger as we let another’s negative attitude infect every cell of our being. There is no way to cure a virus, just like we cannot control another’s attitude. In the past we have used drugs and/or alcohol to suppress the virus multiplying inside us, and as long as we kept using our drug of choice, the virus remained suppressed and continued to multiplying under the surface.

In recovery we have made the choice to abstain from drugs and/or alcohol, leaving us vulnerable to the virus of a negative attitude which we are confronted with on a daily basis. This is why we must prepare ourselves with an arsenal of antivirals. Antivirals, unlike antibiotics, do not destroy their target, they inhibit development. Another’s attitude cannot be controlled and a virus cannot be killed. However, you can inhibit the development of another’s negative attitude within yourself. Support, meetings, counselors, groups and self-care are all antivirals we must use in our recovery in order to inhibit the development of a negative attitude within ourselves and maintain our sobriety.

So if attitude is a contagious virus, what kind of virus are you spreading to others?

Ally Neppl, CSAC, ES

Certified Substance Abuse Counselor

Equine Specialist

www.TurningLeafWellnessCenter.com

HEALING THE BRAIN IN RECOVERY

 

I have been challenged to blog once a week and I am making a commitment to do so.  No, this was not originally one of my New Year’s Resolutions, however, it now is. 

I recently finished reading the book My Stroke of Insight, a Brain Scientist’s Personal Journey by Jill Bolte Taylor, Ph.D.  At age 37 she suffered a massive stroke in the left hemisphere of her brain.  She states it took 8 years, however, she has now healed her brain completely and her book recounts her journey.  It is a powerful read in further understanding the brain, the right and left hemispheres, and the brains amazing capacity to heal. Since alcohol and drugs also affect the brain, I learned some important tools that can apply for healing the brain in recovery from addiction.  In her Appendix B at the back of the book, she lists Forty Things I Needed the Most.  I am not going to repeat all 40, however, I am going to paraphrase the first 5 and compare healing in recovery from addiction. 

Number 1 – I am not stupid, I am wounded.  Please respect me.  When someone is wounded physically it is easy to see and be empathetic, however, when one’s brain is wounded, it is hard to see and appreciate just how severe the wound may be.  In the process of recovery, it is important to respect ourselves and how we have wounded our brain enough to do the work of healing.  Dr. Taylor spent eight years working and challenging herself to heal her brain completely.  She is living proof, it can be done!  Yes, she had a great support group, however, she did the hard work. 

Number 2 – Come close, speak slowly and enunciate clearly.  Here she talks about how energy can be positive or negative to our healing.  Those who are loud and speak fast with nervous energy is counter-productive.  How is our own energy and how is the energy of others around us. 

Number 3 – repeat yourself, assume I know nothing and start from the beginning over and over. So many times I hear from client, “ I know all that, I have been to treatment before”.  Perhaps repetition is needed for my brain to internalize and for me to take action? 

Number 4 – Be patient with me the 20^th time you teach me something, as you were the first.  The average for treatment experiences by clients with addictions is 8.  How patient can we be with ourselves and with others in the recovery process? 

Number 5 – Approach me with an open heart and slow your energy down.  Take your time.  Hopefully, we can approach our recovery and healing with an open heart and offer the same to others. 

Again, any thoughts and comments from others is greatly appreciated.

Sue Judd, MSS, LSAC

Licensed Substance Abuse Counselor

TurningLeafWellnessCenter.com

ADVERSITY: DON'T YOU KNOW? IT'S POTENTIAL ENERGY!

It is important for us as human beings to remove the value statement of “Wrong” from the adversity we experience throughout our lives. So many times as I have worked with clients, the fear of being wrong has played a significant role in their ability to take healthy risks, progress, let go and heal.  It is critical for us as human beings to change the way we see adversity. 

We have grown in our understanding to believe that adversity comes because of something we have done wrong or believe it is some form of cosmic punishment.  The reality is adversity is the potential energy that growth needs to occur.  Just as a germinating seed will grow within its husk, pushing itself to the point where it eventually bursts through; the strength and energy it now has after working through adversity creates the capacity to then penetrate through the soil under which it finds itself. 

Our adversities are no different in that they contain the same energy which will propel us forward. Our understanding and confidence building will increase to prepare us for the journeys that lie ahead.  To stifle or avoid it is to deny progression.  Avoidance comes through the fear of not wanting to be wrong or feel discomfort.  We find ways to avoid through addictions, blame, self-loathing and other forms that keep us numb.  The solution comes through embracing adversity and understanding that it is potential energy that promotes growth.  

Simply put, here are the steps to moving through adversity:

1. Change the way you see adversity. Adversity is potential energy that promotes growth.

2. Remove the fear of adversity by seeing the value in it.  Adversity is needed to progress.

3. Build a tolerance for the discomfort that adversity creates.  Let go of the fear of being wrong.

Dean N Nixon
Seminar Director, Life Coach

TurningLeaf Wellness Center

YOU WANT ME TO GO WHERE?

The willingness to commit ourselves to a path that brings both knowledge and growth requires commitment.  It is our commitment that opens the doors and guides our feet as we set out on a journey to progress and heal.  It is through the commitment to the path that intention is born. 

The intention that we carry in our hearts will always guide our focus and give us the ability to see the subtle answers that we normally would miss day to day.  As we walk with a hunger in our hearts and an appetite for whatever it is we seek, our senses are more open to finding, consuming and internalizing the steps we need.  As we progress through our days, if we commit to ourselves to set healthy boundaries with those we love and do not let fears or insecurities interfere, we will be more alert to the subtleties. We will have the ability to discern how and when to set boundaries even when we find resistance in it. 

Commitment is what pushes through the barrier of resistance and allows us to refocus on the intention of keeping relationships healthy.  We do not allow discomfort sway us from the ultimate path we are on. 

Dean N Nixon
Seminars Director, Life Coach

TurningLeaf Wellness Center

I DIDN'T LOOK LIKE THIS WHEN I STARTED

Humans have a tendency to be extremely adaptable. This has been proven simply by the ability we have to live and survive in the extremist of conditions. At times I think to myself, “We have no business living in the desert when it’s 125 degrees.” Then I see those who live in Antarctica or the Arctic Circle and not only live but thrive. This is true of all climates.

It is this adaptability that often times becomes our demise.  A few weeks back I was pulling oranges from a box. I was intrigued by the fact that round oranges had flat sides where they had pressed next to another orange very tightly in this box.  I pondered how the natural shape of this orange had been changed by its need to adapt to the temporary living conditions prior to being consumed.  It was then that I realized we are also like these oranges and our natural shaped behaviors, thoughts and feelings can all be shaped by the environment that we allow ourselves to be in. 

I have often said that we are easily defined by our 5 closest friends because it’s these 5 closest friends we allow to influence our shape.  Take a look and see if you can learn something new about yourself.  Are you like the orange?

Dean N Nixon
Seminars Director, Life Coach

TurningLeaf Wellness Center

IT'S NOT ABOUT CHANGE, IT'S ABOUT GROWTH

What does this mean???

TurningLeaf has founded this motto based upon the understanding that the majority of human social issues come from trying to change who they are, to be of value to somebody else, rather than taking who they are and growing the strengths that are inherently theirs. 

Our philosophy is derived from the two ways that people are motivated. Fear or Love. We have learned that fear, as a long term motivator, is a defunct system and that over time, breaks down, creating repetitive unhealthy behaviors.  Love or “Value Based” motivation creates long term healthy behaviors, simply by helping people understand why they are doing what they are doing. 

Value Based Living increases the understanding and need to continue healthy behaviors.

Currently we implement value based living in all of our services. Specifically, if you have thought about attending our Value Based parenting class but wanted more information, follow the link which will bring you directly to our web page that gives a breakdown of this 8 week course.  (Value Based Parenting)

Dean N Nixon
Seminars Director, Life Coach

TurningLeaf Wellness Center

SILENCE

The restlessness of the day disturbs the stillness of the quiet mind.  It is within the silent moments that we can find answers to the struggles we are working through.  By increasing the stillness or the quiet moments we will connect to our discernment.  Just as the stillness of water reflects our image, the stillness of our minds will reflect the answers we seek. 

Dean N Nixon
Seminar Director, Life Coach
TurningLeaf Wellness Center

JUST ONE MORE PIECE OF PIE

The true demise of New Year’s resolutions isn’t the failure to accomplish them, but the intent by which they were set.   Most of the time we feel that the true failure to keep New Year’s resolutions is due to a lack of will power or the inability to stay committed.  In truth, the demise is set within the intent of why we chose the resolutions to begin with. 

All too often we allow external influences to become our motivation rather than focusing on our own truth, our own needs and focusing on what is healthy for us.  For example, getting caught up in the physical self-image that we portray to the world and placing high value on our physical appearance can often times cause us to be self-conscious or insecure about our weight.  We plan on losing weight, or working on our figure knowing that we will be attending a high school reunion or playing on the beach in the summer.  We work hard until we reach those end dates.  Once those end dates have moved on our purpose and resolution has now disappeared.  We find our motivation to continue to exercise and eat well starts to become less of a priority. 

If, however, we can see the value in the long term health benefits, we can now start to focus more on the value of why we are doing what we are doing as an internal motivation rather than an external. This can be accomplished by focusing on how we feel when we are eating healthy and exercising and focusing on the feel of the success of keeping our agreements with ourselves and commitments that we have made.  The New Year’s resolutions that are most often kept come from an internal motivation and resolve to increase one’s value and the ability to see ourselves in a long term healthy way.   

Dean N Nixon
Seminar Director, Life Coach
TurningLeaf Wellness Center

FACEBOOK CONTEST - Win TurningLeaf Services

TurningLeaf Wellness Center "LIKE" Contest

HOW IT WORKS?

The "LIKE" contest is simple. Every new "LIKE" to the TurningLeaf Wellness Center Facebook fan page from August 2, 2011 to August 31, 2011 will be entered into a drawing to win a TurningLeaf seminar gift certificate (Valued at $478).  This certificate may be used for any scheduled seminar through 2012.  TurningLeaf will keep track of who is "LIKE" ing the page through reports available to us.

CURRENT FANS

For our current fans, we did not forget about you. If you are the one who referred the Winner of the contest, you will also win a Seminar Gift Certificate in addtion to TWO coaching sessions with Dean Nixon, Life Coach.  As new fans are referred, a thank you will be placed on their wall asking who referred them.  If the new fan lists you as the person who referred them, we will make note of your name, in case they are the Winner.  New fans may list multiple people who referred them.  In this case, and if they win, a separate drawing for those who referred them will take place for the  multiple people listed. In the event that no referral is given, a random drawing will occur among all those who have been listed as a referral for others. The more people you referred, the more entries you will have in the drawing.

INCREASE YOUR CHANCES

If you are a New fan during the contest time frame, you may also increase your chances of winning by making your own referrals to the  TurningLeaf Wellness Center fan page.

How to Find our Page and SHARE?

At the top of this site, click on the Facebook icon which will take you directly to the TurningLeaf Fan page. If you haven't already, click the "LIKE" icon. Then, share the page with your friends by clicking the "Share" button (found on the lower left hand side of the page) which will post a link on your Facebook wall. In your personal message, post something like “Like this page for a chance to win a Free Seminar valued at $478. Don’t forget who referred you if you win, because I will win too”

Additional Information

No purchase necessary. No age restrictions apply. Contest ends August 31, 2011 at Midnight. The winner will be contacted the same day as the drawing (September 5, 2011) through a Facebook post.  The winner(s) will also be announced on the TurningLeaf Wellness Center Facebook wall.